20 SONGS TO AVOID CHEESY WEDDINGS

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BRACE YOURSELVES

…wedding season has arrived! You’ve splashed out on an expensive train ticket, hotel room and a ridiculously expensive outfit for your friend’s wedding. He or she looks great, everything looks perfect, in fact you’re about to put this day into your top 5 weddings EVER list until… they bring out the hired DJ; the local mullet bearing master of dance floor hits that even your nan would roll her eyes at.

Yes folks, we’ve all been there, sat in front of unbearably bad “Gangnam Style” choreographies or newly weds dancing to “Angels” by Robbie Williams (please no, not again). Generally when I hear the first notes of “Your Song” by Elton John, I get a sudden urge to crawl up into a ball under the table, snuggle up to a bottle of champagne lying around on the buffet (for lack of anyone better to hug), and rock myself into an emotional coma.

Don’t get me wrong, the first dance is great, but why go down the beaten track? Why choose the cheesy songs, the songs they play at the local supermarket when you’re buying toilet paper?

It’s a scandal I say. I am done, through with the “I’m yours”, the “You look wonderful tonight”, the “When a man loves a woman” and I definitely cannot “Feel the love tonight” (sorry Elton). Nope, I’ve decided to give you 20 alternative wedding songs  instead of your run of the mill wedding playlist. Here are 20 love songs that will make your heart swell rather than remind you of the verruca cream you bought at the shops.

1. HEROES – DAVID BOWIE

Because you can be heroes just for one day, your wedding day, and it’s just you two against the world. Nothing can stop or get in the way of your official love union.

2. PLAYGROUND LOVE – AIR

“I’m a high school lover, and you’re my favorite flavor. Love is all, all my soul. You’re my Playground Love”

Haunting, provocative, steamy, dripping and languorous just as love should be.

3. ALLIGATOR – GRIZZLY BEAR

This song isn’t exactly dance material, I’ll grant you that, but Grizzly bear summarizes in a single minute love like no one else can… besides anyone who nicknames their loved one “My Alligator” deserves a high five and an extra slice of wedding cake.

4. STUPID THINGS – YO LA TENGO

“And I still want. We always wake before we fall

I always know that when we wake up you’re mine. Wake up . . . you’re mine”

The chorus just says it all: If you’re still happy waking up next to your person every morning, even when you hit the rough patches, you know you’ve made at least one right decision in your life.

5. ANYONE ELSE BUT YOU – THE MOLDY PEACHES

Love isn’t always about perfect hair, trails of perfume, sizzling summers and candlelit dinners, it’s also about loving and embracing your soulmate’s little flaws: back hair, boogers, salad stuck between the teeth, indigestions, burp contests, slippers, and a mutual love for Burger King. Because really, when it comes down to it, “I don’t see what anyone can see in anyone else…. but you”.

6. TAKE CARE – BEACH HOUSE

True this song lacks positivity, it discusses a hypothetical love, one that’s not quite fully blossomed yet, but the song is also about the basic human need to care for the one you love. At least you know that if things go pear-shaped in life, you can always count on Mr or Mrs to drag you out of your hiding place to wipe away your salty tears.

7. HEARTBEATS – THE KNIFE

“Heartbeats” is an ode to pure nostalgic love, elevated by an outstanding vocal performance that hankers after teenage innocence and love. An “Indietronica” masterpiece, restrained and yet sexually charged, great for lusty wedding looks and bringing out the goopy teenager in you

8. SIMPLE SONG – THE SHINS

Long live the kings of indie romance: The Shins. A classic uplifting, explosive and hip swaying indie love song if ever I heard one.

9. BABY’S ARMS – KURT VILE

It’s late (or early morning), most of the guests have started to slip off home and the fuzzy effect of the alcohol is wearing off. Kurt Vile’s “Baby’s Arms” is the perfect song to sway to as dawn begins to break.

10. LOVE BUZZ – NIRVANA

Oh since when did weddings have to be prim and proper? NEVER.

11. IVORY COAST – PURE BATHING CULTURE

“I know that you will love me till my eyes do close, you’re what I love the most.”

Sometimes you just got to get straight to the point, no need to beat around the bush.

12. HIGH FOR THIS – THE WEEKND

Might as well skip the first dance, waste no more time and head straight to the nuptial suite… to hell with entertaining the guests.

13. ROCHE – SEBASTIEN TELLIER

No need to understand leeee French, you know Sebastien Tellier is talking about the kind of love that screams OOOH LA LA. Hot!

14. THE LUCKIEST GUY ON THE LOWER EAST SIDE – THE MAGNETIC FIELDS

Because weddings aren’t just about impressing the rest of the world with your undying love, weddings are also an excuse to bounce shamelessly around with your homies, pulling off awkward dance moves that you’ve been practising for months in front of the mirror.

15. DIGITAL LOVE – DAFT PUNK

Fist pump the air, reach for the stars, it’s your wedding day for Pete’s sake! Bust out those mean air guitar moves like nobody’s watching.

16. CAN’T DO WITHOUT YOU – CARIBOU

Well that’s why you got married right… so might as well make it your forever anthem.

17. PLAGE – CRYSTAL FIGHTERS

“Time is short. You know you live one life.It was love at first sight.

And being by your side is the only thing on my mind”

A simple and sweet reminder of those first awkward dates walking side by side and not knowing how to tell them that they sent your heart spinning into orbit.

18. LAY YOUR HEAD DOWN IN MY ARMS – KEREN ANN

Remember all those blissful afternoon naps with your soulmate, drooling like two podgy old cats snoozing in the beams of sunlight streaming through the window? Well now you can nap together in the sunlight until death do you part <3.

19. HOOP OF LOVE – DOMINANT LEGS

Give your bridesmaid a chance to shoot a naughty look at her own love interest from across the room. A perfect “let’s get closer and wiggle on the dancefloor” song.

20. WE BELONG- RAC – KATIE HERZIG

Because no matter where you are or where you go, “you belong to where your soulmate is going”. Ain’t love grand! *sigh*

Here is the full playlist: